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29.04.2024
03:22
I Love English
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Как утомить людей
Ух, этот невозмутимый мужчина меня уже замучал!! Как его достать наконец-то? Как заставить его обратить на меня внимание? Нужно как-то всколыхнуть его непоколебимость.
Если вы оказались в подобной ситуации, вот вам пособие по этой теме!
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Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
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Ask people what gender they are.
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Practice making fax and modem noises.
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Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..."
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If you have a glass, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
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Speak only in a "robot" voice.
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Blow your nose when some one is eating.
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Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "eat away your food " !
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Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
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Name your dog "Dog."
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Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."
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Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace."
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Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.
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Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
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Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person."
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Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
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Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
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Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
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Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
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Drum on every available surface.
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Staple papers in the middle of the page.
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Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
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Set alarms for random times.
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Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.
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ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
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only type in lowercase.
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dont use any punctuation either
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Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
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Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."
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Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
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Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
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Chew on pens that you've borrowed.
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Wear a LOT of cologne.
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Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
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Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."
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Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."
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Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.
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Never make eye contact.
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Never break eye contact.
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Make appointments for the 31st of September.
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Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
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And finally........recommend our site to them :-)
Источник: http://www.indianchild.com/ways_to_annoy_people.htm |
Категория: Юмор | Добавил: pashoklviv (24.03.2011)
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